Becoming Badass (When the Five-Year-Old Stops Running the Show) – Theresa’s Story
- Ben Hickman
- Nov 4
- 2 min read
We're Done Pretending, A Reflective Rebels Podcast. Season 1 Episode 6
Ever feel like you’re doing all the “grown-up things” (holding it all together, leading, parenting, working) and still somehow that little kid inside you is calling the shots?
That’s where Theresa found herself.
After years of moving between countries, jobs, and identities, from Zimbabwe to South Africa, to Portugal, and eventually to Carlisle, she realised something big: she’d been letting the five-year-old version of herself run the show for far too long.
In this week’s episode of We’re Done Pretending, Theresa talks about what it takes to step into the adult version of yourself, the one who finally calls the shots, owns the mess, and doesn’t apologise for being strong, outspoken, or imperfect.
Theresa’s journey: moving countries, finding belonging, and starting again
Theresa’s story is full of movement: new schools, new countries, new beginnings. Each shift brought lessons about belonging, resilience, and survival.
But what stands out is how she’s turned those experiences into strength — not the polished, “I’ve got this” kind, but the real kind that comes from loss, loneliness, and starting over (again and again).
She talks about grief, motherhood, and what it means to finally stop performing someone else’s version of your life. And she does it with humour, heart, and the kind of honesty that makes you breathe a little easier.
Listen to this episode if you’re ready to stop pretending you’re fine.
It's for you if you:
Feel like you’ve been “fine” for too long
Are tired of being the strong one all the time
Keep outgrowing versions of yourself and wonder if that’s normal
Need a reminder that confidence can come later in life — and that’s okay
Want to hear from someone who’s learned how to own her story, even the shit bits
Theresa’s truths on confidence, community, and growing up
“Five-year-old me was kind of running the show. Adult me actually knows what she’s doing.”
“Sometimes we’ve just got to talk about the shit things too — not just the ones that happen to us, but the ones we do.”
“If women are confident, it often comes across as something else. But it isn’t. I’ve stepped into my adult shoes — I’m properly living my life.”
“Granny made me become a celebrant. She didn’t follow her dreams, so I’m making sure I follow mine.”
What you’ll take away from this conversation
You can start again, more than once.
Confidence isn’t about perfection, it’s about presence.
You’re allowed to outgrow people, places, and patterns.
Owning your story means owning all of it, even the bits that make you wince.
Community doesn’t just appear; you create it.
Listen to the episode
🎧 Becoming Badass (When the Five-Year-Old Stops Running the Show) – Theresa’s Story
Available wherever you get your podcasts. Or here on Spotify.
Stay connected with Reflective Rebels
Coaching: If this resonates and you’re ready to explore becoming your own badass self, email ben@reflectiverebels.co.uk
Follow Reflective Rebels: @reflective_rebels on Instagram
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Read Theresa’s writing: https://substack.com/@theresawritesnow
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