Manifesting Freedom: The Girl Who Refused to Stay Small
- Ben Hickman
- Aug 26
- 9 min read
Reflective Rebels Podcast: Season 1, Episode 3
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At 10, Ewa moved from Poland with no English and learned to hide who she was after facing racism. Twenty years later, a pandemic breakdown became her spiritual awakening. Her story proves that sometimes you have to lose yourself completely to find out who you really are.
From attempting a shop in her treehouse, to building businesses during COVID, and discovering manifestation could change her bank account. Ewa's journey - Polish immigrant to confident entrepreneur is a masterclass in refusing to stay small.
What We Can Learn
Ewa's story offers profound lessons for anyone who's ever been told to be smaller, quieter, or more acceptable:
Breakdown can be breakthrough - Sometimes crisis is the catalyst that forces us to question everything and rebuild from a stronger foundation.
Manifestation is practical - It's not about magical thinking but about training your mind to work for you rather than against you, then taking aligned action.
Freedom has a price, and it's worth it - Choosing uncertainty over security feels terrifying, but the alternative - feeling caged - can be worse.
Your limiting beliefs aren't facts - Childhood stories about money, success, and what's possible can be rewritten with conscious effort and new evidence.
Authenticity requires courage - Refusing to stay small means risking judgment, but the alternative is a life lived for other people's comfort.
Some stories begin with a moment of crisis. Others with a moment of clarity. Ewa's story begins with both - separated by twenty years and connected by an unshakeable refusal to accept that this is just how things are.
At 10, facing racism in a new country, she learned the dangerous lesson that maybe being herself wasn't safe. At 30, during a pandemic breakdown, she discovered that hiding who you are is even more dangerous.
The Girl Who Sold Paper Jewellery
Before Ewa learned to make herself small, she was a force of nature. At six, she was making jewellery from gold-coloured foil paper and trying to sell it to passing neighbours on the street. By eight, she'd opened a shop in her treehouse, complete with a banner and carefully purchased stock.
"I went to the shop, bought loads of stock and opened a shop in my tree house," she laughs. "Didn't really anticipate the fact that the tree house was in my back garden that nobody could see. Apart from me and my cousin. We kind of just cut our losses and ate all the stock."
The entrepreneurial spirit was there from the beginning, inspired by her father, who named his building company after her. But it was also driven by something deeper - the financial insecurity that marked her childhood and would later fuel her determination never to struggle again.
Learning to Navigate Difference
Everything changed when Ewa moved to the UK at 10 with no English beyond "what's your name?" and "hello." Thrust into Year 6, she had to navigate not just a new language but a new culture, new social dynamics, and the challenge of being visibly different.
Most of the kids were kind, showing her things when words failed and helping her learn. But some experiences left their mark. A classmate calling her a "Polish bitch" - devastating when you're 10. Then something more serious: an older boy threatening to kill her if he saw her again, simply because she was Polish.
"After that I was really scared to leave the house for a long time," Ewa remembers.
The most damaging lesson wasn't about physical safety - it was about belonging.
"I did have some experiences that weren't so good, which kind of made me realise that, yeah, I am different. And therefore maybe I need to try a little bit harder at trying to fit in rather than perhaps be who I was back in Poland. So that was like my first experience of thinking, hold on a minute, maybe being myself isn't good."
That thought would take years to undo.
The Entrepreneur Evolves
Despite learning to tone down parts of herself, Ewa's entrepreneurial spirit couldn't be completely suppressed. By her teens, she was running a profitable 'Mars bar' operation at school, buying multipacks and selling them individually for a pound each!
"I was like a little Del boy, but girl version," she grins. "I had my little notebook with everything. It was great."
Her father's business had taught her valuable lessons - both what to do and what not to do. She watched him work harder than anyone else while paying everyone else before himself, a people-pleasing pattern she was determined not to repeat. "I still work too much, apart from that, I make sure that I pay myself well for doing so."
The Breakdown Before the Breakthrough
Fast-forward to 2020. Ewa was working in recruitment when lockdown hit. As restrictions tightened, her workplace response was to increase micromanagement. For someone who describes herself as "a rebel by nature," this felt like suffocation.
"Anytime that I feel contained in a cage in any sort of shape, way or form, I just rebel," she explains. "It's almost like panic sets in, I need to break out."
The decision to go self-employed happened in her parents' kitchen during a complete breakdown. "I just went over to my parents' house and I just broke down and I never cry in front of them. And they were like, what's going on? And I was like, I just can't do it anymore."
Their response was immediate: "Right, leave. Like if you need your mortgage covered, we'll help you out. You don't have to worry about money, just leave. Because your health is more important."
The Identity Crisis
What followed was six months of transformation that Ewa describes as moving through every possible emotion. She partnered with a former colleague, working as a paraplanner while he handled the mortgage advice. She launched on social media and started building leads. But as her savings dwindled and the pipeline remained thin, the fear set in.
"I was literally on like my last month of money," she remembers. "I was like, right after this, I'm skint. Like I've got a mortgage to pay, how am I gonna do this?"
But the real crisis wasn't financial - it was existential.
"That felt like an identity crisis. I genuinely thought I was like, I'm having an identity crisis, I don't know who I am. And all of a sudden, everything that I thought was true kind of disappeared and I was like, who am I?"
The Awakening
The transformation began with a book - "You Are a Badass" - and accelerated through TikTok, of all places. When Ewa posted a video describing her confusion and internal turmoil, a stranger commented: "I think you're going through a spiritual awakening."
"What even is that?" was her response. But as she researched, everything started clicking into place.
"All of a sudden I was like, no, hold on a minute. This is how all of this works. Let me utilise it and let me use it to my advantage. I am the co-creator. I can do what I want. I can create anything."
Practical Magic
But Ewa's approach to manifestation isn't mystical - it's practical. "I think manifestation is more so just training your mind to work for you, not against you," she explains.
The real test came when she applied for a grant she was sure she wouldn't qualify for. She got it, providing exactly the financial bridge she needed until her business income stabilised. Then TikTok took off, bringing paid sponsorships and multiple income streams.
"It was almost like everything started working out for me the more that I was changing my mindset about it," she reflects.
Her approach required what she calls being "delusional" - not in a disconnected-from-reality way, but in a strategic refusal to accept limitations. "I had to embody the version of me that was already making the money that I set out to make before I was seeing it in my bank account."
Rewriting Money Stories
Growing up with "money doesn't grow on trees" messaging, Ewa had to consciously rewrite her relationship with money. She spent her renovation savings on a new beauty room setup, trusting it would pay off even when her logical mind questioned the decision.
"I was like, no, I know it's going to pay off. Like, I know it's going to pay off. So it did."
The key was moving from "I don't know how it's going to happen" to "I don't need to know the how. The how will be revealed as long as I'm in the right mind frame."
Finding Authentic Freedom
Now, Ewa's definition of success has evolved completely. "Joy is just being able to do what I want when I want and just feeling more free," she says. Tomorrow's forecast is beautiful, so she'll be out on the fells in the morning - something impossible in traditional employment.
Her approach to life has shifted from accumulating material status symbols to prioritising experiences and authentic self-expression.
"I used to think it was all these like material things of, you know, massive house and sports car and everything like that. Don't get me wrong, there is still a small part of me that is desiring certain things like that. More so for the comfort than the image. It used to be for the image. I don't care about that anymore."
The Message from Beyond
Perhaps the most profound moment in Ewa's transformation came during a meditation when she heard her deceased grandfather - whom she'd never met - warning her about stress: "If you carry on like you are, you'll end up with a heart attack like your dad."
Whether you believe in spiritual communication or see it as her subconscious processing stress signals, the message was clear: something had to change.
"Now, probably selfishly, I prioritise myself," she says. "So if I want to go get a massage in the middle of the day, I'm going to go get a massage."
Refusing to Stay Small
Today, Ewa is on what she calls "a great journey of evolvement," focused on "uncovering my authentic self and letting that shine." After decades of learning to hide who she was, she's choosing visibility over safety.
"I don't know if the world is ready for it, but you know, we'll find out."
Her philosophy has shifted from serious striving to joyful being: "Why so serious? This is a human experience. We're here to have a good time. My motto for life is I'm here for a good time, not a long time."
Listen to the Full Episode
Timestamps
00:00 - Introduction to Reflective Rebels Podcast
00:47 - Ewa's perfect June day and love of spontaneity
04:04 - Poland trip and the 24-hour campervan journey
06:47 - Moving from Poland at 10 with no English
08:32 - First experiences of racism and feeling different
11:45 - Family's brave decision to start over in the UK
13:48 - Childhood entrepreneur: from paper jewellery to treehouse shops
18:54 - Turning points: relationships, self-employment, and breakdowns
23:49 - The micromanagement panic and leap to self-employment
27:37 - Identity crisis: "I don't know who I am"
28:23 - Spiritual awakening through TikTok comment
32:49 - Discovering manifestation and changing money mindset
36:44 - Overcoming limiting beliefs about money and success
40:43 - Solo travel and finding authentic self
44:41 - Message from deceased grandfather about stress and health
47:52 - Thank you for listening
Mentioned in This Episode:
Moving from Poland to UK at age 10
Google Translate conversations about ice cream
Early business ventures (jewellery, treehouse shop, Mars bars)
COVID-19 pandemic and self-employment leap
"You Are a Badass" and "You Are a Badass at Making Money" books
TikTok viral success and social media growth
Spiritual awakening and manifestation discovery
Solo travel experiences
Lake District hiking and spontaneous adventures
If This Resonates...
Ready to refuse to stay small in your own life?
Ewa's story reminds us that sometimes the biggest breakdowns lead to the greatest breakthroughs. That manifestation isn't magical thinking - it's practical mindset work. And that choosing freedom over security might be the scariest and best decision you ever make.
Join our email community for more honest stories about entrepreneurship, authenticity, and the courage to bet on yourself.
And if you're ready to explore your own rebellion against staying small - whether it's starting a business, changing careers, or just being more authentically you - I'd love to explore how coaching can support your journey. Sometimes we all need someone to remind us we're allowed to take up space. Contact me!
I'm Ben, and through The Reflective Rebels Podcast and my coaching work, I help people navigate life's uncertainties and find their own sources of strength and joy. Every story shared on this podcast is a reminder that even in the hardest times, your story isn't over yet.
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